The Gift of Counsel

By Fr. Conor Donnelly

(Proofread)

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

My Lord and my God, I firmly believe that you are here, that you see me, that you hear me. I adore you with profound reverence. I ask your pardon for my sins and grace to make this time of prayer fruitful. My Immaculate Mother, Saint Joseph, my father and lord, my guardian angel, intercede for me.

“These things I have spoken to you are yet dwelling with you, but the Advocate, the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom your Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your mind whatever I have said to you” (John 14:25-26).

In the Gospel of St. John, the Holy Spirit is referred to as the Counselor. He gives us the gift of counsel.

It's one of His seven gifts that come into our souls every time we receive the sacraments. It comes with the supernatural virtues of faith, hope, and charity, and with all the other six gifts of the Holy Spirit.

St. John also tells us, “He who follows me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of life” (John 8:12). The Holy Spirit comes to give us the light of life, to counsel us, to give us advice in different situations, to show us the way to go, to help us with encouragement, with affirmation.

There may be many moments when we could stray a little from the path that leads to God. We could wander down many cul-de-sacs, many side roads that don't really lead us anywhere.

But God has assured us, “I will instruct you and teach you the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you” (Ps. 32:8).

It's important that we would have one ear cocked, one antenna up, for those little directions that the Holy Spirit may give us, to send us in the right direction, the light of life.

The Holy Spirit is our best Adviser, our best Teacher, our best Guide.

St. Josemaría liked to refer to Him as “The Great Unknown.” He's not known as much as He should be, but also, He's the great friend. We can always turn to Him.

It's logical that every day of our life we would try and invoke the Holy Spirit in some way because we need that guidance, we need that light.

Our Lord also encouraged the apostles for the situations that they might find themselves in, very difficult situations.

What He said to them was very heartening. “When they deliver you up,” we're told in St. Matthew, “do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say; for what you are to say will be given you in that hour. For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you” (Matt. 10:19-20).

If on some occasion we have to speak in those sorts of circumstances, it can be good to invoke the Holy Spirit and then just say whatever comes into our mind.

A pharmacist in Ireland many years ago told a story of how he attended a professional meeting of pharmacists. There was a panel of speakers who were trying to encourage them to stock the contraceptive pill. This was back in the early 1970s.

One of the speakers was one of the main moral theologians in the major seminary; he was not clear on Humanae Vitae. This man said a number of things that were not in keeping with the teaching of the Church.

This pharmacist, who used to come to a lot of classes of formation, took his faith very seriously, tried to put it into practice. He realized that he had to say something, but he'd never spoken in public before. But he realized he had to raise his voice. He had to stand up and do something. So he invoked the Holy Spirit.

He said, ‘I went to the microphone, my teeth were chattering, and my knees were knocking. I said to this Reverend: Professor, Father, I'd just like to say that I think the teaching of the Church is not quite what you said that it was. It's slightly different. It's one, two, and three.’

Very briefly, very clearly, but also very politely, he made his point. Then he sat down. People came to him afterwards and said, ‘That was fantastic! You should speak more often!’ He attributed that success to the Holy Spirit.

There was a student in a class in Brazil who had a similar experience. Some teacher in some subject said some things that were not quite in keeping with the teaching of the Church or were a little bit off.

This student, who had a little bit of formation, realized that he had to try and say something. It wasn't easy to try and “correct,” in inverted commas, his teacher. But he felt that as a good Christian, he had to raise his voice; disagree, at least.

He put up his hand and when he was called upon, he said, ‘I’d just like to say that I think the real teaching of the Church on this issue is this, this, and this.’ The teacher said, ‘You come and see me after class.’

The student got very worried. He was thinking, ‘Oh, my goodness! Now I'm in big trouble. Maybe he'll throw me out of the class. Maybe he won't let me take the exam at the end of the year. Maybe he'll block my graduation.’ All sorts of worst-case scenarios were beginning to appear before his mind.

As he walked towards the teacher's office, a phrase of Scripture came to his mind, which is the one we've just read:

“…do not be anxious of how you are to speak or what you are to say. For…you will be given in that hour. For it's not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you” (Matt. 10:19-20).

He complained to God and he said, ‘You said you would put on our lips what needs to be said in these situations. And now look at the mess I'm in. I should have kept my big mouth shut!’

He went along to the teacher's room and knocked on the door. The teacher said, ‘Come in.’

When he went in, the teacher said, ‘Where did you learn those things that you were saying in that class just now?’

Somewhat apologetically, he said, ‘You see, in the last few years I've been attending a center of Opus Dei downtown, and maybe in some of the talks there, I must have picked up some of these ideas.’

He tried to be as gentle and as apologetic as he could be, almost apologizing for his existence. The teacher said, ‘Well, keep going to that place.’

The fellow was a bit surprised. ‘Keep going to that place? But you were just saying the opposite ideas there in the class.’

The teacher said, ‘Keep going to that place because when I was your age, I used to go to that place. They were trying to get me to change my life, but I didn't have the courage or the fortitude to do so. Ever since then, I've spent half my life saying stupid things and the other half trying to justify what I was saying.’

The student came out of the teacher's office saying, ‘Thank you, Holy Spirit. Thank you, Holy Spirit.’

The Holy Spirit places on our lips what needs to be said, whether we're speaking to a group in public or whether we're chatting to our best friend over coffee or over a beer, whispering in their ear those gentle words that they need to hear.

The Holy Spirit will place on our lips the key words that He wants us to say, and we'll leave a mark on the soul of that person, because we have not said them for any human reason but because we're trying to fulfill our vocation to be an apostle and a follower of Christ.

We know that we will always have the special assistance of the Holy Spirit, as all Christians have had when they've been placed in special circumstances down through history.

It may be that we're writing a letter to the newspaper. We might be phoning into a radio program. We might be giving a class or a talk. We invoke the Holy Spirit, and somebody somewhere will be inspired by the things that we're saying or writing or communicating.

Our job as Christians is to help enlighten the consciences of people in the moral choices that daily life presents.

Nearly everybody in every sphere of professional activity has to make certain choices: whether or not to cooperate with evil, or whether to stand up and say no; to choose the right way of acting to perhaps save their job, but at the same time not do anything wrong. This is a need that's keenly felt in our days.

There can be a lot of little crises in people's professional lives. There's a wide uncertainty about true values.

We have to try and be aware of the need to neutralize certain destructive forces in society—destructive forces for the family, for morality, in medicine, in law, in fashion. These destructive factors can easily find their way into the human spirit, particularly when it's agitated by passions.

We need to introduce healthy positive ideas in so many places. We need the help of the Holy Spirit when we're writing that email to the newspaper, to point out politely and clearly certain ideas that may not have been correct in other people's contributions.

There is a certain commitment to moral restoration. That's where we have to be, as ordinary lay people in the middle of the world called to sanctify the temporary realities, to order them to God.

We have to be at the forefront. The prayer must arise from the members of the Church so as to obtain very special help from on high.

When God hears that cry, the Spirit of God responds to that plea with the gift of counsel. He enriches and perfects the virtue of prudence and guides the soul from within, enlightening us about what to do, especially when it's a matter of important choices—perhaps the choice of choosing a professional line, choices of responding to a vocation, or about a path to be followed among difficulties and obstacles.

That choice that we make may have the capacity to give great leadership. You might be the only person in a class or in a profession, in a club, or in a society.

But the fact that we stand up and say something, reflecting true values, then truth reverberates in the mind and in the soul like a squash ball in a squash court.

It's beautiful. It's true. It's loving. The Holy Spirit is there behind those words. They can have a great force.

God has placed us precisely where we are, to have that influence—sometimes at a very personal level, saying very deep things to our friends and acquaintances; things that will make a difference in their marriage, in their family life, to their children, maybe to their health or their finances.

Ultimately, that hopefully will make a big difference in whether or not they will get into heaven. That's what it's all about.

The Book of Wisdom says, “The deliberations of mortals are timid, and unsure are our plans” (Wisd. 9:14).

Many people don't know where they've come from, where they're going, what life is all about. Many people are a bit lost. They follow the first leader that comes along.

The gift of counsel can act like a new breath in the conscience, suggesting to it what is illicit, what is right, what is becoming, what is more fitting for the soul.

Recently, somebody came to me with a medical moral problem, a difficult one.

A young family faced two handicapped children and of course the obvious question—do we have more children? Do we not have more children?

The only thing you can say to people in those moments, and very strong and very clear, is don't do anything that is wrong. In ten years’ time, you can regret it enormously. You can make the biggest mistake of your life. We have to go before God as He made us.

It's a very sad thing to listen to the tears of a woman in her forties who was ligated when she was thirty. I've seen a couple of women in that situation and at least two of them wanted to have the ligation reversed. There is no obligation to do so because just that operation alone carries a certain risk with it.

But these two ladies said, ‘No, Father, I want to have it reversed because I want to go before God as He made me.’

I know another woman who had it reversed at thirty-eight and had another baby, and that baby became the joy of their whole family.

The quick fix can look very attractive. But when time passes it can become a different story, when we realize we've done something wrong.

“The softest pillow to sleep on at night is a tranquil conscience.” The conscience becomes like the “healthy eye” of which the Gospel speaks (Matt. 6:22)—an eye which acquires, as it were, a new pupil, by means of which it is able to see better what to do in a given situation, no matter how intricate and difficult.

God wants us to help all young married couples, and also those not so young, with advice to build up their family, to build a civilization of love, a culture of life. We've come to change society.

We need the gift of counsel in all sorts of ways. We need it every day of our life.

Aided by this gift then, the Christian penetrates the true meaning of Gospel values, in particular, those expressed in the Sermon on the Mount:

“Blessed are the poor of spirit…Blessed are those who suffer injustice…Blessed are those who thirst for righteousness…Blessed are the peacemakers” (cf. Matt. 5:3-12).

The behavior of so many Christian martyrs shows how the promise that Our Lord made has been fulfilled in the Church. It can be very moving to read, in all the material that's come down to us, about the serenity and wisdom of people with little learning, and sometimes even of children, but have sometimes, have a great gift of counsel.

God gave a very special gift to certain people in certain stages of history. St. Catherine of Siena, writing to influential people, writing to popes.

The Holy Spirit assists us even in the smallest difficulties. He'll be there especially for us in times of stress when we have to confess our faith.

These can be key moments in our life—key moments when we give that key example that God wants us to give, which may be completely politically incorrect, unwelcome to certain ears.

But maybe, with the passage of time and with grace, people will remember what we said or what we did on a certain occasion. The path we took. The decision we made.

Through the gift of wisdom, the Holy Spirit perfects the acts of the virtue of prudence, and prudence in turn tells us which means to use in any given situation.

Sometimes the Holy Spirit may tell us to be silent. Not to react. Not to lose our temper. Not to have a knee-jerk reaction. To be silent, because now our children are older. They've heard everything. We get the gift of counsel to keep our silence and pray.

Somebody said once, “The person who has the truth knows how to keep silent.” They don't need to argue or prove their point. So sometimes we give great examples with our silence. We let things pass. We let people discover the truth that we already know.

Sometimes the decisions we have to make may be in very important matters. Sometimes they might be also very trivial things. But in all those decisions, in some way or another, the goal of holiness is involved.

God gives the gift of wisdom to those who are docile to the action of the Holy Spirit so that they can make decisions quickly and correctly. This gift is like a supernatural instinct‑for knowing which pathway gives most glory to God.

And again, the quick solution, the quick fix, looked at from a human perspective, can look so attractive. It can look like the solution to all our problems. But later on, we find that that decision did not give glory to God, and it can become the greatest regret of our life.

A nun here in Nairobi who in 1969 went to Uganda as an obstetrician. She was an Irish nun and doctor. In 1969 she was the second obstetrician in the whole of Uganda—20 million people.

When she was qualifying in the UK, I think it was Birmingham, the Abortion Act had just been passed. But she refused to cooperate.

She told me that thirty years later she went back to visit her Professor of Obstetrics. When she met him, the first thing he said to her was, ‘You know, I envy you.’

She said she thought that ‘maybe he envied me because of all the things that I've been able to do in Africa.’

But he said, ‘No, I envy you because you never did any abortions.’

Thirty years later, it was a different story. A man looks back on his professional life and regrets everything and has a certain envy for other people who manage to keep their hands clean.

One of the great goals of our professional life has to be to keep our hands clean and keep them above the table. For that, we need a lot of light from the Holy Spirit, the light of life.

The prudence that's present in all our actions, the Holy Spirit through the gift of counsel, is the light and permanent guiding principle of our actions.

He inspires us when we choose the means to carry out God's will—not just the goal, but also the means.

He leads us along pathways of charity: what to say, what not to say, how to say it; of peace, of joy, of sacrifice, of fulfillment of duty; of faithfulness in small things; take care of this little thing, look after this other little detail. He marks out the path for us at every instant.

The first area where we have to use this gift is in our own interior life. In the soul, in grace, the Paraclete acts in a silent way—gently, but forcefully.

This most wise Teacher has skillful ways of teaching us ways that are wonderful to watch—ways that are all sweetness, all affection, all goodness, all prudence, all discretion.

The love of God is poured into our souls by the Holy Spirit. In The Way, we're told, “Never make a decision without first stopping to consider the matter in the presence of God” (J. Escrivá, The Way, Point 266).

In another point, we're told, “Don't waste the opportunity of yielding your own judgment” (Ibid., Point 177).

The Holy Spirit may enlighten us to let things pass or allow for the fact that we may be wrong. Don't insist. There'll be very few times in our life when we have to insist because everybody else is wrong.

If we are humble, if we recognize our own limitations, we will feel the need to seek advice at particular times.

Then we ought not to go simply to the first person we meet, but, as we’re told in Friends of God, “to a person with the right qualities, to someone who wants to love God as sincerely as we do and who tries to follow him faithfully. It is not enough to ask just anyone for their opinion. We must go to a person who can give us sound and disinterested advice.”

“As we go through life, we find ourselves coming across people who are objective and know how to weigh things up, who don't get heated up or try to tip the balance towards that which favors them. Almost instinctively, we find ourselves trusting such people, because, unassumingly and quietly, they always act in a good and upright manner” (Friends of God, Points 86 and 88).

We can be reminded of those words in St. John: “He who follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” (John 8:12).

If we try to follow Jesus each day of our life, we won't be wanting in the light of the Holy Spirit at every moment.

If we're upright in our intention, He will not allow us to fall into error.

Every day in our Rosary, in the Litany we invoke Our Lady, “Mother of Good Counsel.” She will win for us all the graces we need if we go to Her with the humility of those who know that on their own, they will stumble and they’ll lose their way.

Mother of Good Counsel, pray for us.

I thank you, my God, for the good resolutions, affections, and inspirations that you have communicated to me during this meditation. I ask your help to put them into practice. My Immaculate Mother, Saint Joseph, my father and lord, my guardian angel, intercede for me.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

GD