Making Good Decisions or The Virtue of Prudence

By Fr. Conor Donnelly

(Proofread)

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

My Lord and my God, I firmly believe that you are here, that you see me, that you hear me. I adore you with profound reverence. I ask your pardon for my sins and grace to make this time of prayer fruitful. My Immaculate Mother, Saint Joseph, my father and lord, my guardian angel, intercede for me.

“The Lord replied, ‘Who then is the wise and prudent steward whom the master will place over his household to give them their allowance of food at the proper time? Blessed is that servant if his master's arrival finds him doing exactly that. I tell you truly, he will put him in charge of everything he owns’” (Luke 12:42-44).

In all of His teaching, Our Lord places great importance on the virtue of prudence. It is often referred to as the first of the cardinal virtues. A cardinal virtue is a virtue on which many other virtues depend. Cardo, cardinis in Latin means hinge. It's a hinge virtue.

In St. Luke, we are told, “The master praised the dishonest steward for his prudence. But the children of this world are more astute in dealing with their own kind than are the children of light” (Luke 16:8).

On another occasion, Our Lord talks about a man who was about to go abroad “who summoned his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents, to another two, to a third, one, each in proportion to his ability. Then he set out on his journey, and the man who would receive five talents promptly went and traded with them and made five more” (Matt. 25:14-16).

Later on, Our Lord was to commend that servant for his prudence, using his talents well, using his time well, thinking of the future, not wasting opportunities.

“I glorify you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth”, we're told in St. Matthew, “for having hidden these things from the wise and prudent and revealing them to little ones” (Matt. 11:25).

There are many places in the Gospel where Our Lord uses the terms, “Be watchful”, “Be wise as serpents and prudent as doves”, “The Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect.”

The truly prudent person is always attentive to God's promptings. Through his vigilant listening, he receives in his soul the promise and reality of salvation.

The word ‘prudence’ comes from the Latin prudentia, contracted from providentia, which means seeing ahead, having foresight. Prudence can be defined as the virtue that disposes our practical reason to discern our true good in every circumstance and to choose the right means to achieving it.

Notice how prudence discerns the true good, not the false goods—the authentic, deep, profound, true good in every situation, in every decision, in every circumstance.

Prudence also chooses the right means to achieve it. Not just any means: the best means, most fruitful means, most efficient, most economical.

The Book of Proverbs says, “The prudent person looks where they're going” (Prov. 14:15).

St. Thomas Aquinas says that “prudence is recta ratio agibilium (St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologica. Question 57). It's the right reason in action, right reason applied to practice, right reason in doing, ordering things according to their end or their purpose—doing things or using things for the purpose for which they have been created.

It's the virtue that has as its object to tell us what to do in each particular case.

We're told in Friends of God: “‘The wise heart will be reckoned prudent,’ we read in the Book of Proverbs (Prov. 16:21). We would have a mistaken idea of prudence if we thought it faint-hearted or lacking in daring. Prudence expresses itself as a habit that inclines us to act well, by shedding light on the end and by helping us to seek the most suitable means of achieving it” (St. Josemaría Escrivá, Friends of God, Point 85).

It's not to be confused with timidity or fear or duplicity or dissimilation.

It has often been described as the charioteer of the virtues. It guides the other virtues: makes us prudent in our humility; prudent in our order; prudent in our punctuality; prudent in our charity; prudent in our battle to live the virtues of purity and chastity.

So many areas of our life need this virtue. We’re also told in Friends of God, Point 164: “We have to be prudent. Why is this? In order to be just, in order to live charity, and to give good service to God and to our fellow men. Not without reason has prudence been called ‘the mother of virtues’ and ‘the guide of every good habit.’”

There are many unforeseen things in human action, and that's why a virtue then is necessary to point out the best means that applies the general principles to circumstances that may be changing all the time.

It's prudence that guides the judgment of conscience. The prudent person determines and directs his conduct in accordance with his judgment.

We're told also in Friends of God, Point 87: “Wisdom of the heart guides and governs many other virtues. Through prudence, a man learns to be daring without being rash. He will not make excuses (based on hidden motives) to avoid the effort involved in living wholeheartedly according to God's plans. The temperance of the prudent person is not insensitive or misanthropic; his justice is not harsh nor is his patience servile.”

St. Thomas Aquinas was asked once for his opinion on three different candidates who were possibilities to be elected Master-General of the Dominican Order, to which St. Thomas belonged. He was told that one is very holy, one is very knowledgeable, and the other one is very prudent.

The answer of St. Thomas was: If so and so is very holy, let him make us holy. If so and so is very knowledgeable, let him teach us. But if the third person is very prudent, let him govern us, because the most important virtue in governing is the virtue of prudence: to have foresight, to think things through well, to see the consequences of our actions, to make proper plans, to have vision.

Any person involved in the role of government at the level of a family, of an organization, of a country, of a sports club, of a team, then that virtue is the most important virtue that they need to have.

It's right reason governing our actions. It tells us how to do things properly, to be calm, to be careful in our planning, to study things well.

I heard once that Cardinal Ratzinger was visiting the University of Navarre many years ago. He was being shown around the University, which he enjoyed and liked very much, and praised very profoundly.

At one stage somebody was driving him somewhere in the car and asked his opinion about a certain matter. Cardinal Ratzinger said: ‘I’d have to think about it,’ or ‘I've never really thought about it.’

In other words, he didn't immediately express an opinion, the great mind that he was. He had the humility to say, I need to think about it and to think about it carefully before expressing an opinion.

Somebody else might have rushed in to give their two cents’ worth on the particular issue in question. This great man paused and asked for time to think about this particular issue.

If there's no prudence in our life, or very little, then our work may be full of goodwill, good intentions—but it might have little fruit.

Prudence guards us against being impulsive. Being impulsive means not engaging our common sense because common sense is given by prudence. There's a saying in medicine that says, ‘commonest things are commonest.’ Commonest things are commonest.

If somebody has a pain in their chest, you could think of a hundred things that might give rise to it, but the most usual or most common things are the most common things. Those are the things you've got to think about first. Or the same thing for pain in their abdomen, etc.

Prudence helps us to think about the consequences of our actions—not to rush rashly into certain situations, or saying certain things, or having certain opinions. We gain a lot in wisdom by growing in this virtue.

Humility can be very important when it comes to prudence, because if we think we have all the answers, we can very easily make many mistakes, and that's very imprudent.

God will help us if we use the means that He's given us. He's a prudent ally if we use the means He's given us to study things properly, or to read up on a certain topic, or to get advice.

To listen carefully is part of prudence, to ask the right people for the advice that we need, not to listen to any Tom, Dick, and Harry that comes along. Or to read what others may have written on a certain topic.

If we don't do such things, then we may be proud or we may be immature.

Prudence is there to decide what the best thing for me to do is, here and now. What does God want of me in this particular moment?

Very often St. Josemaría, when a matter came up, would ask a few people to study this thing, ask them to pray about it. We don't make important decisions that affect the spiritual life of thousands of people before praying and thinking about it very carefully.

“To be wise as serpents and prudent as doves” (Matt. 10:16).

I like to say that in matters of government, important things can wait. Very important things must wait.

Cardinal George Pell in his Prison Journal talks about how various people have written to him from all over the world, and often they offer him beautiful little prayers or beautiful pieces of advice or quotations from famous people.

One of the little phrases that he was sent from, I think, a famous Greek philosopher, said that “truth comes with time” (cf. Lucius Annaeus Seneca). “Truth comes with time”—sometimes it takes time for the truth to come out.

I heard a famous philosopher in Asia, Fr. Joseph de Torre, saying that patience is a great social force.

Often, we need to have the prudence to let time pass. If we have to make a certain important decision, it may be good to sleep on it. Or just sleep on it for a few nights.

Sometimes, things can look very different after a good night's sleep or when we let a bit of time pass.

We get a new optical angle on things, a new dimension. Sometimes things take time and it's good to delay them and allow that time to happen. Things mature with time.

It may be good to consult other people, even on small things. Should I buy this thing? Should I buy that thing? Should I make this journey? Should I make this phone call? Is it really necessary?

Occasionally it may be very prudent to keep silent in a situation. For a father, for a mother with teenage children—they may have heard all your lectures already; they know all your points of view. But often your silence is your greatest weapon.

Often the person who keeps silent is the one who knows the truth, and that way, communicates the values, and often, communicates love.

We're told in the Passion of Christ that when Christ was asked by Pilate a certain question, Jesus autem tacebat–“Christ kept silent” (Matt. 26:63).

Euripides, a famous Greek philosopher, said: “Silence is wisdom's first reply.”

We don't commit ourselves—leave things up in the air, often let people work things out for themselves, or allow them the opportunity to discover the truth for themselves.

We pray and mortify ourselves to be able to make good decisions, to do things with calm.

Every time we receive the gifts of the Holy Spirit and the graces of God in the sacraments, we can also ask Him for an increase in all the cardinal virtues, the basis of so many other virtues—prudence, justice, fortitude, temperance. We need them in so many things.

There's a point in The Way where St. Josemaría says: “Don't judge without having heard both sides. Even people who think themselves virtuous very easily forget this elementary rule of prudence” (J. Escrivá, The Way, Point 454).

It’s very easy just to hear one side of the story. If a child comes home and tells you all sorts of terrible things about a teacher, be prudent. Go and talk to the teacher. Find out the full story.

Very often, educationalists say that a teacher and a parent should not be separated. Don't let the child split the two.

The same thing with parents: always united. Go and ask your spouse what the full story was. The child learns much more from that unity of authority than it does from many other things.

Prudence lets us see things coming. At times, we may need just to let them pass by, to know when to act, when to wait with patience, and to know how to relate events to foresee the consequences they can have, seeking always to do the Will of God.

We can see that it's a virtue that has many practical applications on a daily basis. It’s very important for a mother or a father of a family also to teach teenage children, as they grow, what the meaning of this virtue is, so they come to be circumspect.

Part of this virtue means that we don't trust ourselves. We have self-confidence, yes, but we also know we can make mistakes—and maybe, big mistakes.

A style of government that fosters prudence is a very useful thing. Two heads are better than one. Six are better than two.

You can apply this to all areas of government: of a family, of a team, of a factory, of any organization, of our apostolate, of our work. Perhaps to things we should read in our spiritual life. Or even when we're buying clothes—not to trust our own judgment.

Some people may be very good at that; other people—it may not be one of the talents that God gave them.

All virtues grow together. We need to try and acquire all the virtues because God wants us, as a consequence of our Christian vocation, to guide other souls.

Certain people that may have been entrusted with particular roles of government will need this virtue a little more. The bishop, the pope, maybe the parish priest are people who have command of areas of formation.

If we're prudent, we'll be docile. Those people that have been placed in positions by the Holy Spirit in order to guide us—it's very good to consult them, to refer to the criteria that they may give us.

All this helps us to be a person of sound judgment and maturity. These are great qualities to have in a human person: a person of sound judgment and maturity.

When St. Josemaría was founding Opus Dei at the age of twenty-six, he asked God for eighty years of gravity: to have the prudence and wisdom of a person with eighty years’ experience, because he had to make many important decisions (J. Escrivá, Friends of God, Point 54).

He also had a phrase where he used to say: Old age does not make you holy. Sometimes young people can think that ‘all the holy people I know are elderly people.’

But if we're a bit of a devil at twenty, we can be the same devil at ninety. Virtue doesn't come with age.

As somebody said once, “Wisdom sometimes comes with age, and sometimes age comes alone” (Oscar Wilde). You can say the same thing about all the virtues.

Prudence may sometimes come with age, but sometimes age may come alone. You can find some people who are very frivolous and superficial at a young age, and fifty years later they're still the same.

Time alone doesn't make us better. It's one of the reasons why we have to work on our improvement, because we're called to perfection, called to holiness.

We need wisdom. This requires study, requires thinking, and that's not compatible with intellectual laziness or passivity.

In spite of all our prudence, sometimes accidents happen. God's loving providence plays a part in those accidents.

But in those situations, we have to try and accept the will of God and realize that “all things turn out for the good of those who love God” (Rom. 8:28). There's something good hidden in every situation.

There's a Chinese saying that says: ‘I've eaten more salt than you've eaten rice’ I have more experience. It's prudent to consult people with experience.

That doesn't mean that they have a Ph.D. They might have a Ph.D. in life, a Ph.D. in their particular area of expertise.

They might be the most knowledgeable person on the planet, without ever having gone to a second or third level of education. They might know their stuff.

If ever, through imprudence, we cause things to happen that are not necessarily the will of God, then we can ask forgiveness.

But also, we can try to learn how to avoid those things by observing the criteria that we're given. It's the fruit of common sense.

This has very practical applications, like keeping our car in good condition; driving in a sensible way; avoid driving at night or after we've had a little bit of alcohol.

Or getting our work done on time; or foreseeing a whole pile of other things that might occur as we go into this particular weekend. It can be prudent for a child to get their homework done early.

Prudence can never be lacking in all the things that we do.

To acquire this virtue in our quest for holiness and apostolate can take years. An Olympic champion doesn't happen overnight. We don't have to run, and take things slowly and clearly, and not neglect any of the steps that God wants us to take.

Very often we find that the saints, when they came across a particular, difficult situation, often they kept silent and they prayed.

If you read the Prison Journal of Cardinal Pell, you'll find a similar disposition there—great peace and serenity and joy in reading the Psalms and seeing the Hand of God behind the contradictions that came his way; the injustice.

But often if we keep silent and pray, things work out.

Imprudence can be shown in hurrying too much, doing things without much thought, being intellectually lazy, avoiding thinking, being frivolous or superficial, being inconsistent.

Our Lord wants us to practice particular prudence in relation to the important things in our life, in our Christian vocation. He’s lit a candle in our hearts. He’s placed a treasure there, on which many great things depend.

“Don't forget,” says St. Josemaría, “many great things depend on whether you and I live our lives as God wants” (J. Escrivá, The Way, Point 755). He said that to every mother and father in the family.

We have to be careful with that vocation. The devil may be trying to blow out that candle. We have to take care of our soul, which is immortal and will live forever. We have to expose it to good ideas.

Sometimes, in the 1960s, you could hear parents expressing anxiety about letting their children be involved in certain organizations in the Church ‘because they might be influenced.’

We are influenced by everything. In the world we live in today, parents need to take every effort to make sure their child is exposed to good influences, and to limit the bad influences as much as possible.

Our Lord wants us to take care of our soul through the Sacrament of Confession, exposing it to grace, be exposed to formation so that we grow spiritually, doctrinally, intellectually, apostolically, humanly, in all sorts of ways.

We need prudence in relation to the virtue of purity and chastity: to take care of the places that we go to, the movies that we watch in our home or on our computer, or the things we see on our phone, or the messages we receive or send, or the people we mix with.

We need to be prudent in relation to our health: not to self-medicate, to get advice.

We need to be prudent in relation to the sports that we practice. Certain things may be inappropriate at certain ages: rock climbing for a father of five at the age of 50, or tightrope walking for the mother of four at the age of 45, or bungee jumping or squash at 55.

We need to be prudent in relation to our rest: to get the proper hours of sleep.

Prudent in relation to our finances: to spend when necessary, avoid frivolities, not creating needs for ourselves.

We need to try and be prudent in our work, becoming as specialized as we can, knowing our job, practicing intensity, trying to learn to be easy to work with, keeping the people around us happy with our courtesy, with our communication. Fulfilling our duty, being in the right place at the right time.

Prudent when it comes to study by putting our whole heart and soul into what we're doing, possibly not listening to music at the same time, or in the presence of a TV set.

Prudence in relation to family life, so that we're present in the family. Our heart is at home. The best time of our life is at home and with our family.

We need to be prudent in relation to dealings with people of the opposite sex.

Prudence in relation to our readings. A man may become what he reads. If that's so, then we need to be very careful of what we expose ourselves to in our reading.

We need to be prudent about the things we hear and the things we pass on. We can easily indulge in gossip.

It’s not enough to want to do good. We need to choose the right means to achieve it. Life is a constant decision-making process.

“Don’t confuse serenity with laziness,” we’re told in The Forge, “with neglect, and putting off making decisions or studying questions that need attending to. Serenity always goes hand in hand with diligence, which is a virtue we need in order to consider and resolve pending matters without delay” (J. Escrivá, The Forge, Point 467).

In the Litany of Loreto, we refer to Our Lady as “Virgin most prudent.” We don't just say that Our Lady was prudent, but the superlative we use, “most prudent,’ is a translation of Virgo Prudentissima.

“Most prudent” because she listened to what was said to her by the angel. She got the message of the Holy Spirit. She made important decisions—to go to visit Elizabeth, to go to Bethlehem; and she and Joseph—the decision to go to Egypt.

I thank you, my God, for the good resolutions, affections, and inspirations that you have communicated to me during this meditation. I ask your help to put them into practice. My Immaculate Mother, Saint Joseph, my father and lord, my guardian angel, intercede for me.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

CPG